last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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