i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
