I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize