you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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