Three words: puerto rican gang bang
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
