I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
