his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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