Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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