try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I've blown a few things in my day
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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