I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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