So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
