was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
