Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
