She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
