I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize