hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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