I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
