i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
soo... how was my night?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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