She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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