Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
