Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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