me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
