i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
