don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize