Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
