He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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