I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
