We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Semen is not good for contacts.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
