Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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