his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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