My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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