yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
