there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
She told me I should be a condom model.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
