I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
