dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
