OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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