I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
