Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
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