I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
