she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize
