he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Drunk is a universal language darling
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
