She is in my trunk
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Randomize