Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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