Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
now i know why i became what i already was.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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