How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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