How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
