How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
