brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
