That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize