I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize