We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
she pinky promised me she was 18
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
When are your genitals available?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
